Friday, 30 May 2014

The 12th Day: One Desire

May 24, 2014

I'm on my 2nd wk of my 2-months Bed Rest and I came to a point that somehow I feel "panicky" (also known as naloloka-of-not-doing-anything). My life right now is the complete opposite of my lifestyle 2 weeks ago. I feel that my body is getting weak due to lack of movement. Maybe I'm depressed?

No matter how i communicate the boredom that I do have to anyone, I get responses that felt like that they do not get me.

I came to the Lord for help. I cried out to God on how to be still in the midst of stillness, quietness, silence. And I know that He's the only one who can understand my deepest need. The Lord then lead me to these verses in Psalm 23.
V1. The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want.
V2. He makes me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside still waters

"The Lord is my shepherd" - my carer, my leader... I have nothing to worry about because He is always with me. He is always one-step ahead of me, & always there to attend & take care of my utmost need.

"I shall not want" - my only desire, my utmost desire.
I shall not want anything & find contentment only in Him no matter what the circumstances are.

"He makes me" - even if I do not agree or feel likr doing so, He makes me, puts me in a place that is good for me. Where I am right now is the greener pasture.

"Lie down" - he settles me, puts me to rest if I needed to. And right now, this my body & the baby needs this.

"He leads me" - where He is leading me, there shall I find peace & refreshment.

Indeed, the Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. God assures me that this is His leading & it is good for me. He is reminding me that he is my shepherd & there's nothing I should desire above Him. And if there is any, this is His way of putting me on the right track.

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